This is my original blog for all our non-caravanning trips since 2009 and more recently posts about coming to terms with being single again having been widowed in 2018. And anything else too really!

My caravanning blog is (Get Your) Legs Down and all our trips in the caravan are there. My grog blog is The Ale Archive where I list every beer I’ve ever tried.

Friday, 1 March 2019

7 Months

So, the balance of time has tipped I feel and the countdown to the 1st year anniversary has begun. Hmm.

It’s been a funny old month - away in Patsy for half-term and although overall it was good I had a bad morning on the last full day. Clearing up ready for an early departure I was overcome with such an intense feeling of loneliness - something I’d never experienced in Patsy since  I’ve been touring on my own. It passed of course and I had a very enjoyable afternoon meeting up with friends from Brighton for football in the evening but it returned again in the pub before the match and during the match itself. I contemplated leaving early but again, as always, it passed.

The weekend saw me head up to Cambridge for a birthday party which was really good fun, although there was the inevitable twinge of sadness as Trev would have enjoyed it so much. The floodgates opened again the evening I got home, like having to endure some hideous emotional version of a bush tucker trial, almost as if I was being punished for having a good time,

I was back in Cambridge on Tuesday for the funeral of Trev’s sister Maggie, who had passed away after a long illness, but still far too young at 62. I debated going - it was at the Crem and I feared a reaction, but I wanted to go and it was important to do so, not least because it’s what Trev would have wanted. I did find my mind wandering though to the last time I was there - where I sat, the photos, the words, the music and the people. I’m aware that there now often seems to be a delayed emotional reaction to things like this but so far, none has come.

Right, to this months photo - Trev of course, being watched over by Teddy. Teddy was a Christmas present from Trev’s elder sister Rosemary when we moved into our first home together - so at 17 he’s getting on a bit too! Trev had two Labradors - one after the other, both called Teddy - and we talked lots about getting a dog ourselves.

The photo was taken at Christmas and was at the Cherry Hinton club site in Cambridge but I can’t place the year - 2014 to 2017 is the nearest I can get.

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